Bridgewater Soccer Mom's view of the world

For months I've been avoiding politics. I consider myself a well-informed person, but over the past year I have lacked inspiration to engage in politics. After years of following local events eagerly, attending school board meetings and spending time involved in the community, I'm feeling rather apathetic this year. Enter a scientist and Bridgewater mom running for statewide office But something changed last weekend when Christine Chen  knocked on my door. If you haven't had the pleasure of meeting her, check out her video. It is her in a nutshell.  Why vote for Christine Chen? I can write all the reasons I'm going to vote for her - she's a scientist - and Bridgewater Mom - who is running for statewide office. She's got kids in our school district, so she gets it. Accessible, intelligent, informed. She pays taxes here and can do the same ROI calculations (mental) that I do! And, she is a Jersey native trying to raise kids in the community where I...

Good Morning, Beloved Friends (and the 2 family members who read my stuff), It's a glorious Sunday morning here in New Jersey, and I'm thrilled to report that my feet are throbbing. In fact, I had to break my morning running date with PB at Duke Farms because my tootsies need time for the swelling to come down before I lace my running shoes. Don't worry - I won't waste this beautiful day. I've got a non-negotiable appointment with my Sauconies to run a slow 5 miles.  Despite Diego's insisting I get out of bed (earlier than I wanted) to let him out, I'm feeling so invigorated. I've had lots of jobs through the years, and met colleagues that have made their way into my heart and life. But few were like the content team at LN. We just clicked - and maybe cliqued - if wordnerds like us can be a clique. I don't think I'll ever experience a work environment where I'll laugh more than I did with these brilliant folks.  Heels and a Glitt...

Hello My Friends... I've Missed You! What's on My Needles this Spring  Although I've drafted a few blogs over the past 8 months, I haven't published anything lately - nor had I realized how long it had been since you'd heard from me. Life sometimes gets in the way of our creative pursuits, no matter how much we love them. Writing has always been my joy and my catharsis. As I write I create a place where I experience life and reflect upon how the world impacts me - and vice versa. So, of course I've missed blogging. (Full disclosure - I wrote this on Thursday and now, on Sunday morning I'm editing it hurriedly before meeting a friend for a run...) This sunny morning I drove down Country Club on my way to my new job (yes, I have one, but that's not today's topic) and I got inspired... As MR puts it when we get into an intense discussion, "I felt a blog coming on." So I called her for feedback... and I promised to write two blogs. Here...

  Good morning!  Adrenalin is Bridgewater Soccer Mom's coffee this morning. As my Facebook friends know, I spend a lot of energy racing for trains. This morning, as I was pushing 55 mph on the main thoroughfare between Route 22 and our street (I regularly run this road and complain about speeding drivers), I saw the cop and I knew... He did a U-turn, and before he even put on his lights, I'd signaled and pulled over. I rolled down my window and before he said anything I handed him my license and registration and blurted out that I'd been speeding. He finally got a word in. "Are you driving to work?" "I'm racing to catch the train." He asked if it was the 6:20. I looked for the insurance card, saw the date was expired, then in my fog realized something, and picked up my phone and fumbled with it... "The insurance is now an app." Before I could find and open it, he let me go. No warning. No lecture. He said he didn't wa...

My Furry Valentine It's Valentine's Day, the most commercial of commercial days. A day when love seems to become a competitive sport. Hallmark meets high school prom. I think this year's Valentine's day is a great way to explain "my love life." As I type this on my cellphone, Diego and I are lounging on the sofas. The fire my husband built warms us. Lots of people celebrated Valentine's day last night. I did, too. My dad and I drove to my cousins' home and ate a fantastic dinner. My aunt is famous for her cooking, and last night didn't disappoint! We talked family lore and politics. Everyone's favorite subjects. This morning I thought I would have a quick breakfast with my mom's cousin. We couldn't stop talking, and hung out for three hours. Heaven. Valentine's Warmth Last week I was having a particularly challenging day, and I texted my husband. He had just the right advice, "Help your dad. It will make you fe...

Today is Groundhog Day. I see the sun, which... since it's going to be in the 50s, must mean 6 more weeks of.... political rhetoric. I don't think I can take more hateful speech, overblown half-truths and finger pointing. I'm not an undecided voter. I know whom I support, and if you know me and know where I've spent about 20% of my life, you can guess. Some of you like me because of this, some of you like me in spite of my political opinions, and that may be how I feel about you, too.  Growing up in a "mixed" household with parents who were members of different parties, I saw that you can love someone unconditionally even if you don't agree on politicians. Can you hear Mom's sarcasm, "George, your president is on TV." Plus... And here's the surprise... Most of us have nuance to our opinions. Voter A can be against abortion but support the right to choose. Voter B can be hunter but want stronger controls of who can purchase weapons. And ...

All grown up - N spent 6 hours shoveling on both Sun & Mon When you spend years getting your kids get dressed each day,  making sure the basics are covered (underwear and socks), it's almost impossible to imagine that you'd be screaming not "where is your sneaker??" But "move your car... Now!" But that was the last thing I said commanded before I hung up on my daughter at 6:10 am today. Even if my intensity was possibly justified (there is little space on our still-snowy street and the garbage trucks and school buses are expected soon and they may hit her car), my presentation lacked any hint of love. My blood pressure was raised after I had that nanosecond of fear when I didn't see her car. Instead of assuming it was on the street hidden by a huge pile of snow, the logical and correct explanation, my crazy DNA kicked in and paranoia made me think, "Did C go sleep at a friend's house last night? I thought I heard her come in, but what i...

Bridgewater Soccer Mom ponders her ultimate what-if... Brothers Ron (left) and Dino (right) with baby sister, 1971 Plan or fate? What decides the trajectory of an individual's life? As I look back on my journey, it is hard not to wonder my biggest what if. If Dino had lived, would I still be me? If Dino had lived would I have followed a less traditional path?   Instead of living here in Bridgewater, a married mom to two teenagers with a "9-5 job" (well, 8-5), would I have followed in both of my brothers' footsteps and moved to California? Dino had a special gift - tinkering with engines - and a special passion - race cars - ultimately he became a Formula One race car mechanic, training under the Senior Ferrari and turning it into a business. He ran in a wild crowd, married a tall wild soul and by all accounts had a LOT of fun. What chances would I have taken? He prioritized fun in his life - do I do the same? The siblings on Dino's wedding day - ...

Perfect! My babygirl turned 18 on Saturday.  It was a near perfect day for her. She woke up to French toast and then ran her final cross country race on a beautiful day. She didn't set a personal record, but she did run this challenging course in under 24.5 minutes. While at the race, her boyfriend decorated her bedroom, so she arrived to pink and blue streamers. She was thrilled at the surprise.  The highlight for any girl is the party. Mamma cleaned for hours, then set a gorgeous table for seven young ladies. They dined on what girls that age like best (pasta) and talked almost non-stop. Best of all... Since I cooked, cleared, did dishes and took care of the details, while they dined, I got to be in the kitchen with them, listening to their chatter. It reminded me of countless hours of carpooling, when I got the scoop on what really goes on in their heads. That's a secret in parenting. Kids talk in the car, so once they get their licences, moms lose insight ...

Yesterday I spoke with a friend. Her family member is ill (which I learned from Facebook) so I wanted to check in. Turns out she has a lot on her plate, plus her boyfriend broke up with her. Lunch with friends: chocolate fondue - Not exactly a salad My harsh response began with the letter F and ended with HIM!  I repeated this seven times. Every time she began a rebuttal with, "but...." so I proceeded to list ways that she is fantastic and she deserves better. I need to do the same for myself. Take responsibility and focus on being happier and healthier. If you are reading this, you should know that you deserve the same. For me specifically, this means focusing on my health and on the people who matter to me and taking the same advice I give my loved ones: "Dad, you should go to sleep earlier."  "Husband, turn off the TV and get fresh air." "C, be more empathetic - remember not everyone is as fortunate as you." "N, clean your...

Oatmeal - It's What's for Breakfast I used to blog a lot. Lately I've come back to it. It feels good to use my creative juices and share ideas, thoughts and beliefs. And to multitask. I'm writing this in my living room between trips to the kitchen - and the front porch, where Diego is soaking in the vitamin D. I'm writing this on a beautiful - in fact, almost perfect - Sunday morning. My family is all upstairs sleeping despite the sounds of mixing, chopping and pre-heating, with beep-beeps chirping from my oven. I am trying a recipe I found on pinterest. This is the second time in a week that I'm creating something inspired by this online bulletin board. Where was pinterest when I was a stay-at-home Mom with time to cook, bake and otherwise create? Ah, progress. When I retired there will be an app or other yet-to-be-dreamed solution to make a commute more fun. Last Sunday was almost perfect - the only thing missing was my family. I woke on Long Beach Isl...

Option One: Rutgers Prep It's never easy for me to make a decision - I'm always second-guessing myself. Even "do you want fries with that?" gives me pause. Fries: the evil of all food. No nutritional value, no actual potatoes, lots of salt - even sugar (probably) and God only knows what they fry them in. But... Fries - YUM, YUM, YUM! The ultimate in "no means yes". I say no, the kids say yes and I steal some anyway, much to their chagrin - "If you wanted fries, you should have ordered your own!" True, dat! But, it was the right decision to say no. Looking back on the last 25 years you might think I confidently made a series of quick decisions leading to drastic changes. Some were. Let's get married. Ok, we survived a couple of years of marriage. Let's have a baby... Ok. We did that. Let's quit our jobs and move abroad.... Option Two- stay in district with kids he knows Many of the biggest decisions, though, came ...

The sun rises as commuters head to "the city that never sleeps" Guess what happened? One of my friends read that I'd blogged and she sent me a card. She sat down (presumably) at the table in her bright and welcoming kitchen and took pen to paper, wrote an update of what she's up to and sent it in the mail. And guess what else? When I received it, I was thrilled!! I felt loved. Tangible proof that a friend was thinking of me. Recently, I knit an infinity scarf for a friend who is facing so many daunting challenges that I've almost lost count.  Parkinson's Disease tops the list. Last week she mentioned on Facebook that she'd lost control of her hands. I hope that there's more than a little karma here.  From time to time I feel overwhelmed. This morning is one of the times when I feel the angst growing in my breast. It feels like a hint of bronchitis, except unlike with illness, if I breathe deeply, the air flows unimpeded. It might be lack o...

Quality, Not Quantity - A Quick Ride Along the Hudson at Lunchtime In the past four months, I have started seven blog posts... and completed none. I'm a little disappointed with myself. In light of this I'm going to challenge myself to write and post an interesting blog by the time the train I'm riding arrives in Somerville. We are somewhere between Union and Cranford. My world seems to be in a state of flux on almost all fronts. Some aspects of my life might be different in a year, others definitely will. Next August, I can assume, my daughter will be preparing to leave for college. Life will surely change without my lovely girl. The company where I work is also undergoing changes. As is often the case, this had meant new challenges and an increased workload. This week I spent at least 5 hours learning new skills. In addition I am collaborating with a team called a "center of excellence." It is unclear how I fit in with this group of (mostly) design...

I'm just going to have to admit it. My commute is getting to me. Life seems to have turned into an endless train ride broken up by work and " nighttime naps at home". I truly wonder if my kids are getting fed leftovers. No, not day-old meatloaf, but the sloppy seconds of Mom's attention. Even in my mid 40s I still need the positive feedback of my dad, my boss, my in-laws, friends and lots of people. So, why shouldn't my teenagers? Perhaps worse than "neglecting" my kids, I'm not making good choices for myself. Yesterday's lunch was healthy, but pretty much everything else I ate gave the instant gratification to the tongue, followed by feeling bloated and guilty. (I don't regret the raspberry bar for my lunch-dessert, calories be damned!). Haven't run in more than a week.  Haven't folded laundry in even longer. Haven't seen most of my friends in many weeks. Didn't even call MR on her birthday.  Clean clothes are a necessity,...

New Year Begins with Plenty to Do and Here's How to Do It (Or Not) Yesterday's Cardio = Shoveling Our guests left weeks ago, yet 2015 has hit me hard. My workday and the pressure of "women can (read: should) have it all " continues to challenge me. More than my 9 hours at the office, plus 3+ hour commute and coming home to a messy kitchen needing to be used to make dinner (you know the drill: gotta get the clean dishes out of the dishwasher, before you can put the dirty dishes in, wipe down the space to prep dinner only to make more mess cooking, rinse and repeat), it's the outside world permeating in my thin skin: world news of hostility in so many places I've lost count, domestic politics (don't get me started), unfinished business of 2014 that everyone seems to have forgotten (e.g: where the hell are those Nigerian girls ???) and stressful undertones in the home I share with my husband and two sometimes-moody teenagers. January is the most stre...

Look Familiar? If you're like me, your New Years resolutions last about as long as your dying Christmas tree. With every passing day more needles fall off and eventually you have to admit defeat and hide the body (aka the dead tree or my 16-pack abs). The same goes with my resolutions. Out of sight by Epiphany. This year I'm not making any resolutions. I have more than enough on my plate. All I want to do for my 2015 resolution (and God help me if I'm cursing myself just by writing it down, AND hitting publish) is very simple: FINISH WHAT I START! Even this, is just an echo of the Ghost of Resolutions past . "Live more simply"? Ha - since that blog was posted I went back to full time work and changed jobs to one with a 1 hour 40 minute (on a good day, each way) commute. I don't live life simply, I don't think I can. But finish what I start - why does that scare the hell out of me? Finish a book before starting another. Send my Christmas cards ...

Diego wants Xmas eve dinner! Dear Readers, Happy Holidays! We ate the food, we opened the gifts, we had the traditional Christmas meltdown, complete with drama and a few tears. (Is it really Christmas without it?) We saw the Christmas Show at Radio City and we got gussied up. The list of what I didn't accomplish still beats out the list of what got done, (if you didn't get a Christmas card - don't hate me, there are still a bunch unsent along with my unfinished Christmas gifts). But in the end, Christmas shouldn't be a to do list followed by checked items. It should be about enjoying time with family.  Except if your name is Mom. It seems that I am falling into the same trap that the women in my family have been falling into for generations, in which holidays become a frenzy of guilt and fear that dinner will be ruined. Pure to form, I also declared my turkey doomed to death when the potatoes weren't ready to start when they "should have been."...

'Cause Everyone Is Running for (or from) Something? Yesterday as the polls started heading toward closing time and the votes got guestimated first, then called by various news outlets, I couldn't wait for it to be over. But is it ever really over? The Motherlode: NY Marathon It's a new day. And while I'm pleased that my board of ed candidate won, there were no surprises in the Senate, making me want to put my head in the sand for the next six years... by which time we'll have elected at least one new president.  As I was running up Van Holten road yesterday I remembered how it felt to run for a political office. The highs and the lows. I realized that just running for board of ed impacted me in many ways. I thought I knew who my friends were, but there are always surprises. People who stood by me every step of the way, and others who didn't, teaching me that some affiliations trump friendship. Time has healed that, and I have put it behind me, but...