Good-bye

When you say goodbye to someone in a funeral, ineviably you say hello to many others. People who also loved your loved one.

Today I saw family and friends who I had not spoken to in years.

But no matter which funeral I attend, my mind always wanders... to other funerals.

I think of various relatives - but mostly my Mom. But also I think of my own.

Maybe it is natural. When N entered the catering hall where we were having lunch, he said "when I die, I want exactly these sandwiches!" (until, of course, he tasted. them... then he chose the option for kids: hot dogs).

Who will come to my funeral? What will they say? What will the music be? Can my friends and family work together to make something that has some semblance of my eclectic life? Who will be the "cruise director"?

At Randis funeral her wonderful grandson, Ove gave the eulogy. He told a story about how he had taken her to a funeral a while ago. They spent 15 minutes looking for her keys. When it came time to leave, they couldnæt find it and they just left. In the middle of the service, she found it in her pocket and they lost control of themselves and laughed... out loud, in the middle of a funeral.

Luaghter mattered to Randi. Love mattered to Randi.  That is what I would have said about her. She was like my loud (and somewhat dysfunctional) family: we love loudly and talk about things openly. I always knew where I stood with her, just a sI always know how I stand with my family.

Family counts. Friends count. Food counts, being together counts. Doesnt matter where or when.

These things matter to me too. So what will people say???? Who would come? I guess it sounds very vein when I wonder if the church (or whereeever) would be full?

My life is full of friendships, family and relationships. I matter to those around me.

Dear friends, rememebr to bring laughter and happy memories to my funeral. When it happens. whether in a week or in 50 years.

And bring music.

But for now, let us concentrate of living life! "I want to feel that I live life as long as I possibly can"



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