First one out...

As you may have heard before we are often the first in Bridgewater to let our kids do certain things. Both kids were on airplanes before they could sit up - N flew overseas before he was 3 months old. Sleepovers started at age 2 or 3. C had a TV in her room in Kindergarten. That was a straight bribe. She was also first with a phone in her room. My son followed suit. We have taken several friends with us on vacations. Both kids have flat-screened tvs in their rooms as well as laptops. As I write this my son is upstairs with a friend online playing a game I've never heard of...

Yes, they are spoiled. And I have spent many an uncomfortable coffee defending these things or agreeing sheepishly to other mothers' criticisms. "My mother-in-law bought the cell phones" is something I've probably said about 100 times to various shock-faced BW parents.

What do I do now? Approximately 10 of my daughter's friends have friended me on Facebook. How can I say C is too young when her friends aren't, and by friending them I have condoned their use. C had a short-lived experiment with MySpace that went sour when I read about how horny her friends were!!! EL, VM, HS and others would never write anything like that in their FB statuses (I HOPE!). Their pictures are all tasteful. Their use of FB is completely legit.

Why should I worry? If C is allowed to join the FB world, her first order of business would have to be to friend me! That would give me access to see what she is posting and whom she is friending.

I guess the question is, do I want to friend my daughter? Does she need to read my status updates? About once a week I write about my love for a stiff drink. I have several former boyfriends/lovers/wish-I-were-so-lucky-to-get-them-guys on my friend's list. Do I want my daughter to know about them? Absolutely not!!! With over 350 friends I am guessing C will get bored looking through the names before she gets to the letter C. And then there is the link to this blog...

But do I want my daughter to go clandestine online and not be a part of it? NOT A CHANCE. My cousin said last week that she is on partially to know what is going on in her kids' lives. That sounds good enough for me! My neighbor boy (babysitter of my kids) wouldn't friend me and ever since then I REALLY want to know what's going on in his life!! So if I have this opportunity for my daughter to friend me, maybe I SHOULD take it.

Then again, I friended my Mother-in-Law. She still respects me but I know enough to self-edit. Maybe it's not my daughter's status updates that scare me, but my own! How old is old enough to be on facebook? I'm almost 40 and not sure my stuff is totally appropriate. It's certainly not rated. G. Yet, I'm not ready to friend C which means I'm not ready yet to say yes to her request to join facebook.

Status update: L is... conflicted.

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